# Goodbye Jezebel



## Macabri (Oct 8, 2007)

Last night I had to do one of the hardest things in my life. I had to make the choice to put my little baby to sleep.

As a few of you might have read, Monday night I had to take my little girl to an emergency clinic. It was around midnight, and she was falling over and swaying about badly. They couldn't do much more than stabilize her and recommend a good vet.

On Tuesday my husband took her to the vet and we were left with two conclusions: that she either had a pituitary tumour or a stroke. So we did the best we could, giving her all her meds, feeding her by hand, putting her in a tank where she couldn't fall from anything, everything we could think of.

On Tuesday and Wednesday night she seemed in fairly good spirits and was eating a lot. We were hopeful she would pull through it.

Last night I came home from class and took Jezebel out around 10:30. I held her to my chest and she started twitching and wobbling, almost as if having a seizure. She seemed vaguely aware, but after a while it because obvious she wasn't going to make it.

We called and took her to the animal clinic. She curled up in my arms so sweetly for the car trip over. I whispered to her the whole way, shaking uncontrollably. I wouldn't let them take her to the back without me, worried that I only had a few precious moments left. A doctor came out to take a look and confirmed my fears. Holding her tenderly we said our goodbyes. I remember her lifting up her little head and putting a paw on me, chittering softly, and boggling her eyes even though they were closed.

I stayed with her as long as I could, and watched as she fell asleep for the last time. She looked so miserable at the end, and she deserved so much more.

It's hard to believe she's gone. I only had her for a year and a half, and I was hoping she'd live to her second Christmas. She made me so immeasurably happy when she was alive. I have never felt so connected to any creature before. I no longer thought of her as a pet, she was my friend. I loved her enough to let her go when it was time. It was one of the hardest and most unselfish things I've ever done.

Thirteen is my lucky number and I think she must have known it. So my baby passed away on a 13th so I could never forget her.

She was the sweetest, gentlest, most fun, bright, playful, and wonderful baby I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. I'm going to have a hard time not waking up and coming home to her each day.

I love her so much, and I hope wherever she is she's waiting for me to come and play with her again.


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## ration1802 (Sep 25, 2007)

OMG. I am so SO sorry, I know what you've been through these last few days. 

You're right though, I'm sure wherever she is now she's there waiting for you to come and give her lots of cuddles and skritches.

*Hugs*


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## Macabri (Oct 8, 2007)

Thank you.

I'm going to be calling a cremation service today. They'll pick her up from the emergency center and bring her to me.


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## Forensic (Apr 12, 2007)

I'm so sorry.


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## lilspaz68 (Feb 24, 2007)

The special ones often visit you after they are gone. Not right away because they need to settle into their new existence, but when they love you like that, they come back. 

I am sorry she was taken from you so young. That really hurts the heart.


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## Squeak (Sep 4, 2007)

I'm so sorry for your loss. You did the right thing to put her down, and I'm sure she was thankful. You must have been such a good owner and friend to her. R.I.P Jezebel


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## Macabri (Oct 8, 2007)

Thank you everyone.

I called the pet mortuary today and they're going to cremate my baby and put her in a beautiful box. They're also doing a hand-written scroll to go with it and make an impression of one of her paws in clay for me. (All of that is included automatically in their service.) Hopefully she'll be coming home in about a week and a half when they're all finished.


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## Sparker (Jun 17, 2007)

*hug*

You did the right thing. It might not make it hurt any less, but it was the best gift you could have given her in her time of need.


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## crapola (Feb 12, 2007)

i'm so sorry for your loss


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## madeittothemoon (Nov 1, 2007)

Wow... that honestly made me want to cry I'm so sorry for your loss- take comfort in the fact that you were able to make her last moments as comfortable as possible.


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## twitch (Jan 4, 2007)

its a horrible feeling when you have to make that decision, i've had to do it more times then i would like to remember. but you could not have done any better by her. you were a wonderful mother to her and a best friend. when she needed your help the most and in the most painful way for you, you gave it. i'm sure she will be waiting for you and if you take too long she'll probably come visit you anyway. i hope your heart feels better soon


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## skyedavidson (Dec 19, 2007)

Oh, that made me cry. I'm sorry for your loss, but know that she'll ALWAYS be with you.


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