# People-ing



## MelancholyMarionette (May 5, 2015)

I know it is pretty normal for one to feel like they are bad at people, but I feel like I am from another planet sometimes. I'm so tired of people looking at me when I am talking and just waiting for me to shut up so they can talk. I want intelligent conversation and people who actually care what I am saying. I have terrible anxiety and depression so I don't make a ton of friends, but it isn't very encouraging when people seem to generally be that way and I am way too afraid to talk to anyone who seems different. Sometimes I think "I must just be idealistic" but I really don't know why that is too much to ask.... 
I don't know where to find that sort of friendship. I thought college would be that place, however it doesn't seem like I'm looking in the right places. 
It is so frustrating. Maybe as a philosophy major, I expect conversation to be more deep than it really is? I'm really torn at understanding where the problem truly lies.


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## bloomington bob (Mar 25, 2014)

Here's a good place to start talking to people - Rat Forum is one on the friendliest places online!


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## Mene (Mar 13, 2015)

Although I'm considerably older than you, I can relate....depression, introversion, and i have a few degrees in philosophy. Age has helped me considerably. Oh, and rats too!


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## ksaxton (Apr 20, 2014)

I have anxiety and am introverted as well. I just started college and grew up in the south. I want to make friends, especially more girl friends but every time I try to talk to someone I just cant seem to relate. Girls my age just seem so....silly. Im not an overly serious person, but these days it seems like girls are only interested in clothes, puppies, boyfriends, and the latest internet trends, none of which I follow. Ive tried to make friends but a lot of times I end up fake smiling and fake laughing and I feel like people can tell im faking it and it turns them away. So i totally feel you, intelligent conversations are hard to come by with this generation it seems


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## kksrats (Jul 25, 2014)

I'm not sure how you liberal arts people do it >.< I could never get along with anyone I met from that side of campus. I'm a science geek and since most of us in science suffer the same introversion we tend to form these awkward quiet friendships. I can't really say that most of those friendships are fulfilling in the way you're talking about, but they are far less individual oriented (ie either person being self centered). I usually befriended the older people in my classes since they were less apt to talk about the kardashiwhatevers and their facebooks. I worked my way through college, so I had absolutely nothing in common with most of the people my own age. Unfortunately, it can be hard to be accepted into the older crowd when you look like just a kid yourself. Just be yourself and eventually you'll click with someone. And if that seems to be taking too long, there's always online friends to talk to! I found that getting involved in an MMO game filled my need for socialization pretty well...as sad as that may seem lol


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## Riana (Apr 22, 2015)

I am probably somewhere in the middle of you guys age wise and education wise; but another Philosophy grad here! Maybe we should have a google hang or something sometime! Just because we are all in different places doesn't mean we can't have a live chat together! I dunno, I think we all suffer from similar issues but maybe we want the solution to be something it can not? I kind of find forums weird to converse in, but I'm around if anyone ever wants to set up a rat or phil themed Skype or google chat! Or just keep the chat going in a Philosophy of Awkward (or some equally accurately named place) thread? *waves*

Marionette, your concern echoes my own ongoing battle to find intellectually fulfilling gab but also and ESPECIALLY the expectations part, whoa. I do sometimes wonder what's up with that.. Perhaps because of our anxieties or depression we see the world in a skewed way? Maybe not, but definitely would love to chat about that difference in our perception vs others.. soo.. ya, HMI any time, either of you! or any of us really..


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## bloomington bob (Mar 25, 2014)

Sounds like a really good idea to me Riana - let me know what you decide


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## Jessiferatu (Apr 30, 2014)

kksrats said:


> I found that getting involved in an MMO game filled my need for socialization pretty well...as sad as that may seem lol


Not sad! Some of my greatest friendships were formed online. 

I don't have a crap ton of friends. I have a good few and all but one of them is older than me. I always gravitated toward people who were older, not sure why. Friendship can't be forced and as corny as it sounds, sometimes you just "click" with a person. Finding people with the same interests as you is the best place to start IMO.


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## MelancholyMarionette (May 5, 2015)

I am so glad I am not alone in this haha. 
My girlfriend is a great girl but she is so outgoing. Her friends are really nice but I'm just awkward and quiet so i sort of end up just existing while they all hang out. 
I would love to talk to you guys haha I don't know how the things you mentioned work though >< 
It would be refreshing to find people with similar interests and, though I would wish them on no one, similar struggles.


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