# Mental health glorification.



## Hagguu

Okay, so, anyone who suffers or has suffered with mental health issues will get exactly what I'm talking about (or even people without them, just anyone with morals higher than a shoe really)

My friend is claiming that he suffers from a disorder known as borderline/emotionally unstable disorder. One problem, he doesn't. He literally puts on this mirage that he has it because all he wants to do is sit at home and do nothing and claims he's so mentally ill when he really isn't. He does not suffer from any of the symptoms and did not even know what psychosis or insomnia was (well he claimed to have insomnia when he tried to pass with MPD and schitz, but he goes to bed at 4 and wakes up at 12?! That's just a wrong sleeping pattern) and the worst part? Goes on like he's the most badly done to person in the world and nothing can help him....and this personality disorder is solveable, but he refuses the help and lies through his teeth.

I was in a group therapy with people who suffered BPD, and they all had a horrific even happen through childhood or adolescent (which is where it stems from, a traumatic event) and they had such a hard time getting their lives in order and actually making the effort to get better so they could have normal lives.

I know a lot of others who do this too, but it's so theatrical and comical and so unrealistic that it's embarrassing for anyone with a mental health illness.

What is so wonderful about this existence? What, you think people will like you more if you have a mental illness? Well, let me tell you, you do nothing apart from push everyone who loves and cares about you away because you don't know what you're going to be like when you wake up in the morning, whether or not tomorrow will be the day when you forget who you are and convince yourself people want to break into your house and kill you.

Soory, I just needed to get that out there.


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## Hedgian

I understand that completely. What really gets on my nerve is people who think it's an amazing thing to be depressed. Where they brag about it and constantly talk about it, like no stop. You obviously AREN'T depressed if you're glorifying it. It is a horrible thing being depressed, nothing to glorify about it. Or people who (again don't have it) and use it as an excuse not to go to school or stuff.


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## rudecrudetattooedfatgirl

I'm really tired of people claiming "I'm so bipolar!" I have been in and out of mental institutions, intensive group theryapy, counselling, meds, and even shock therapy and it pisses me off that people trivialize it. Some days are screwy but that does not mean you are having a mixed episode, if you even know what that is. Ugh.


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## nanashi7

I don't think my childhood led to my disorder. 

In any case, I hate this. People who get 6+ hours of sleep and whine about how they're insomniatic. They also spend their nights doing something that causes them to stay awake and then sleep in to compensate. 

My ex just got a suspended from school and got the suspension waived for depression, which he doesn't have and doesn't try to get treated. It seems to me that those who fake diagnoses just benefit and the real "crazies" aren't understood (why don't you just think positive and have you just tried having fun and such comments that are a daily part of being mentally I'll)

Meanwhile I'm bipolar depressive with general anxiety disorder on meds and talking about my feelings; can't get a job or go to school (or anywhere...first agoraphobic diagnosis in my area...) and don't qualify for any aid but free treatment until so much time passes. I hate my meds. I deplore talking to the psychologist. But. It's how I can be normal. Or close to it.


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## Hedgian

I have a case of depression that isn't minor or severe it just is. Then paranoia (creepy things in the dark, i don't know its weird but it happens a lot) mixed with a bit of anxiety (mostly social) I was on meds for about a year but I just felt like crap the entire time so slowly weened off of it. I can't talk to people really, opening up is a thing I struggle with greatly so we always ended up canceling therapy since I wouldn't talk to the person... 
Not an insomniac though sometimes I wish I was so I could stay up and do my homework/draw. Dumb reason I know. But then I am glad I'm not since sleep is precious to me.


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## kksrats

It's almost as if having a mental disorder has become a fad on par with dressing like a hipster. These people either 1. think having something wrong with them mentally makes them more interesting or 2. use it as an excuse for something like laziness or things that stress their comfort level. I have mild anxiety and depression, I cope with it and hardly anyone else knows about it because I don't want it to be a defining factor in my life since it's not bad enough to interrupt my daily activities. I'm definitely not suffering from anything severe, so rest assured that there are those without mental disorders that think the same way you do. I pray that one day lobotomies will become the new body modification fad and perhaps we'll have fewer idiots out there to deal with.


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## Zabora

As someone who is bipolar I find that highly offensive. When I'm down its low like sleep 16 hours a day ki da low. When I'm up I'm spending money I don't have and its like being high. Ive had years of therapy been InstItutIonalIzed and been put on just about every drug known to a pharmacIst. I hated lIfe for a really long tIme and even took myself off of the meds because othey were makIng It worse. Just because you are tranquIlIzed doesnt mean your mInd cant spIn out of control. I am now happIly marrIed, have a great job and awesome educatIon. My personalIty Is perfect for workIng In a kItchen I guess : ) were all crazy. But to just be purely lazy and claim to be depressed is wrong. Unfortunetly there is the opposit to this. People like my sister who have BPD and won't get treated. She's been in and out of jail since she was in the 7th grade never finished the 8th grade got pregnant at 15 and has had 3 more kids since then all different fathers all meth babies.


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## gotchea

I don't think I've ever met a person who doesn't have a mental disorder.


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## kksrats

gotchea said:


> I don't think I've ever met a person who doesn't have a mental disorder.


Haha this may be true to some degree. But when people exaggerate their illnesses to the point that they claim they're debilitating, that's what's annoying. Of course, you also have to consider that most mental disorders have variations, symptoms and sources that aren't extremely well known, so diagnosing them can be difficult.


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## beaner

I agree that this is horrible, I've never mentioned it before but I was diagnosed BPD as a teenager, and I work through depression episodes as an adult. Some days Im perfectly fine, other days it just hits me. It bothers me when people say "OH im so OCD!!" hahaha. No you aren't... you don't know what it likes to work through a compulsion or to have to go through that feeling of lack of control.... It isn't funny and it isn't something to joke about.


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## kksrats

And this is why I changed my intended major from psychology to microbiology  At least in this field I can point my finger at some little organism sitting under my microscope and yell "It's your fault!" I may or may not talk to microbes >.>


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## nanashi7

I have met hundreds of normal people. Some claim illness some haven't been tested or diagnosed with. That bugs me. I've had blood tests and hours and hours of Evaluation done. I have six-month goals all te time (make phone calls, make an online friend more than Fable bringing my friends to 3). These people you meet that are mentally I'll...they're is nothing they're suffering from but life.


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## webspinnr

I dunno. I think people that use mental illness as a cover for attention or to excuse their behavior MAY be mentally ill. Just not how they think they are.  mentally healthy people wouldn't do that.


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## kksrats

Give it a few more years and laziness will show up in the DSM.


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## ksaxton

I agree, this isn't right! One time i met this girl and for the first year of our friendship she convinced me she was schizophrenic, she made up stories of therapist visits and strange visions she had, and I believed every word of it. I had no reason not to. I am a very trusting person who always feels compelled to help people. Finally a few years later she told me it had all been a lie. I wasn't mad, just shocked that someone would even lie about something serious like that. Another thing (like someone mentioned) I hear thrown around a lot is "I'm so OCD!" usually because they like things matching or organized. I'm not OCD, but I do honestly think I might have the tiniest drop of it. For example, whenever I have to lock the office up after hours, I check the locks repeatedly (meaning at least 5 or more times each) and I will keep running back and checking them again and again until I'm satisfied. I don't like doing it, but I cant NOT do it if that makes sense. I have to check the lock four times in a rhythmic pattern, spin around, check again, check again, etc. A lot of times I have to say to myself out loud "okay, I'm doing _____now" in order to convince myself to stop doing things repeatedly. Honestly I get a feeling of high anxiety when I have to lock up, I don't know why and I wish I could just check once but I can't it's really weird. Maybe it's nothing though, maybe just a quirk or something, or maybe a bit OCD, who knows. Completely aside, does anyone else experience anything similar? I really want to stop, it takes up time and it's just ridiculous, but I can't make myself stop


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## nanashi7

Ksaxton, that's how my anxiety disorder started. It was my "coping" mechanism and eventually fell apart. I was like that with touching rows of objects and sidewalk cracks.


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## ksaxton

It's a pretty new thing for me, I don't know what caused it. I will even hurt myself to convince myself something is okay if I have to. Like, I'm always very worried that somehow my bedroom door won't be closed and my rats will escape and get eaten by the cat, so every day when I close the door I will run head first into it so that the pain of the impact will I guess assure me it's closed. I have to do it several times, it's like my mind won't let me accept that it's closed unless I do it at least 5 times. Do you think this is just a weird phase or something?


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## inod3

I think in general we over diagnose mental illness. Especially when it's self-diagnosis. I can understand it though, someone who is going through the worst insomnia of their life might think it's due to a mental illness because it's the worst insomnia of their life. If it's just minor and they later on develop far worse insomnia they at that point would realize their earlier insomnia was a joke, but they don't have that experience to compare to until they experience it.


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## nanashi7

ksaxton said:


> It's a pretty new thing for me, I don't know what caused it. I will even hurt myself to convince myself something is okay if I have to. Like, I'm always very worried that somehow my bedroom door won't be closed and my rats will escape and get eaten by the cat, so every day when I close the door I will run head first into it so that the pain of the impact will I guess assure me it's closed. I have to do it several times, it's like my mind won't let me accept that it's closed unless I do it at least 5 times. Do you think this is just a weird phase or something?


Well, I thought it was to me but this might be a good time to look into counseling or something. I put it off thinking it was a phase and lo and behold six months later I was having panic attacks when my little tricks to make me feel safe weren't working. ThT was about a year and a half ago. Sometimes (my psychiatrist explained) it can just be the result of an underlying condition and mine aren't really based on trauma just a certain age my family hits...right after puberty at 17-19.


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## ksaxton

The girl who works with me is quitting after this month, so that means more pay for me (yay!) but also more work. I'm really worried that my anxiety will get worse being all alone there, I'm worried I'll have even more responsibility and panic thinking I'll forget something or do something poorly. How do I approach a counselor about that though? I feel like I would be dismissed if I said that I obsessively check locks and doors...


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## bloomington bob

You won't be dismissed at all - compulsive behavior like that is something counselors frequently deal with - just be direct


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## nanashi7

You just have to go to a first appointment. It's like a question and answer time and they will tell you what they think and where to go from there. Colleges offer this for free and accept people who just want someone to talk about work or school stress. So a real problem (anxiety) is not going to be dismissed.


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## Voltage

I was pretty recently "diagnosed" with general anxiety and severe social anxiety. I'm not sure if a therapist saying I have these things is an actual diagnosis or not. I have ADD and usually people with ADD are more susceptible to depression I believe. Anyway my family is pretty sure I'm depressed. They used to question it but I guess since I haven't stopped moping around, sleeping in and haven't kept up the best personal hygiene in the world (Ill go a couple days without showering if I don't have anywhere to go and am feeling like crap) one of my ex friends who would wake up at 8 am sharp every day and would take two showers a day and always seemed very energetic called me out on the things I do demanding to know why I'm the way I am. 
I never talked about being depressed around him or anything before so I told him that I think I suffer from depression. He laughed at me and said," YOU do NOT suffer from depression, believe me I know, I'M depressed." he pretty much said it in a how dare you claim to be way. I'm not going to say he isn't depressed because I'm not a jerk like that but I can tell you I never would have suspected.

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## webspinnr

Actually checking and rechecking locks is one of the most common obsessive behaviors, right up there with hand washing. Having that specific of a pattern, combined with the high anxiety and even getting to the point of self harm to stop,I would highly recommend you see someone. You won't be dismissed and wouldn't it be wonderful to get it under control?


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## ksaxton

It's weird, I'm not obsessively hygienic at all though, actually I'm quite a slob to be honest. It's just this fear of not doing something, and then there being horrible consequences that makes me feel compelled to do stuff. Like even if I haven't touched the stove all day, before I leave the house I have to check it repeatedly because Otherwise I worry that somehow it's on and I'm going to burn down my house. It's ridiculous and I know that it's illogical, but I can't not do it. I think I'll talk to my boyfriend about it and then maybe talk to a counselor, I don't really want it to get worse.


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## Voltage

ksaxton said:


> It's weird, I'm not obsessively hygienic at all though, actually I'm quite a slob to be honest. It's just this fear of not doing something, and then there being horrible consequences that makes me feel compelled to do stuff. Like even if I haven't touched the stove all day, before I leave the house I have to check it repeatedly because Otherwise I worry that somehow it's on and I'm going to burn down my house. It's ridiculous and I know that it's illogical, but I can't not do it. I think I'll talk to my boyfriend about it and then maybe talk to a counselor, I don't really want it to get worse.


I'm always terrified that the house is going to burn down while I'm gone. I don't check everything to make sure things are safe before I leave though. I already have a plan on how to get my rats out in the event of a fire. I have a DCN so I'm just going to roll that thing out through the garage since my room is right next to the garage. And ill have my boyfriend grab Lightning while I'm handling the DCN, or maybe we ought to switch roles. Ill have my puppies follow me out. I've played it over in my head so many times. Id rather die trying to save my pets than leave them in a burning house.
Wow I got a little off topic. I over react for just about everything.

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## PawsandClaws

I try not to judge people who say they have mental illnesses even if I suspect them to be lying about it because I feel that we need to be less judgmental in general. I do not know much about the inner struggles of the people around me so I do not think I can be the one that tells them they are wrong. As for me personally, I think I have some sort of anxiety disorder but I am too afraid to go seek help. I have a generally stressful life so I cannot distinguish if my reactions to the stress are normal or not. All I know is that it has gotten a lot worse lately. I cannot force myself to sleep unless I am exhausted to the core and drop to sleep out of pure exhaustion, I do not have a single night of an uninterrupted sleeping pattern and most of the time I will get very little sleep. Little things make me feel like I cannot cope. If for example, something trivial occurs, like my bus is late - I panic and stress out till I feel like I am going to pass out. I lost my mother figure when I was a teenager and I was really messed up for a long time. Eventually I sought out counselling from my college since I realized my depression was affecting my partner at the time and my grades. I feel like I can not have a single day where I am okay, I always find a way to make myself anxious. It just makes me angry at myself to be honest, not being able to cope like a normal person. Anyway, I do my best and try to go through life.


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## Voltage

That sounds like anxiety to me pawsnclaws

I try to be open minded to about mental illnesses. Cause you really don't know a person yknow?
I swear though 90% of people with depression act like they are the only ones in the world who are actually depressed

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## PawsandClaws

I come from a family that basically do not believe in mental disorders so it is especially hard ever talking about anxieties or things of that nature with close relatives. Some people are so old fashioned they do not think a mental illness qualifies as enough of an issue to impact daily life. Obviously I do not agree but changing somebody's extremely stubborn mind on the matter is practically impossible.


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## Vegn

I hate when people self diagnose *everything* A lot of the time, you don't have OCD, you have OCD tendencies. There is a massive difference. Just like saying you have anxiety depression. It IS considered "cute" right now and it makes me want to slap someone who says they have (insert "cute, funny, attention grabbing" mental illness here _____) very frequently. Someone I know constantly tries for attention. Honestly, sometimes I feel bad for her but then she irks me and I just want to yell at her. She doesn't have anxiety, OCD, depression, or ADD (she also used to wear pink a lot and called herself a "bubblegum goth" because she liked pink and was happy all the time but also felt "So sad all the time on the inside and was just faking being happy"). Failing a test because you can't concentrate in class isn't ADD when you spend class staring at your phone. Checking your phone for a new text every 3 minutes isn't OCD, it's called being obsessed. 
Have any of you ever been on Tumblr? Some people on their are so insane talking about how adorable depression is and pretending to have it just for attention. It isn't a switch. It doesn't turn on and off quickly, yes you can have a good day but it will almost always come back.

Side note- I see fairly often people who complain about anxieties towards things like school because they get nervous before a test. As someone with debilitating anxiety (neuro-pysch testing is finally coming up so the specifics can be worked out , right now it's PDD-NOS and Generalized Anxiety Disorder) I can say that anxiety SUCKS. HARD. And hearing "Nothing will hurt you, you're okay" when you are in the middle of a panic attack and the trigger is still there, does absolutely NOTHING. It's like having a bomb strapped to you and being told that you won't actually die but everyone clears out and the timer is ticking down. But worse because part of you knows that you are fine but you can't hear it because a voice inside your head is screaming the exact opposite.


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## Hagguu

It's self diagnosis cases I don't trust. I mean it took me from 13 right up to 18 to actually get a diagnosis, and even that was wrong quite a few times. Or the people who go in for one session and say they've had a diagnosis. They assume that you have that but it can be something completely different.they haven't had enough time with you to make a stable diagnosis. But in all honesty, I've come across so many people who I have confided my symptoms to and they've turned around a few days later attempting to put on a show. I just don't get the mentality. You push everyone away with a mental illness, not purposefully of course, but it just happens. But, it can be extremely obvious when someone is putting it on...I don't know, it's too convenient and they are extremely contradicting in their symptoms. It just makes me feel ashamed, like that's really how you think someone with a mental disorder is? I already feel like a second class human being because of it and these people are just making it worse. Idk.... I'm sending love to everyone, it isn't easy, but we'll get through it.


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## moonkissed

I think it is not really fair to judge others. We don't know what is going on with them and its called invisible illnesses for a reason, not everyone shows signs or have the same exact symptoms or acts the same way. I think if someone is acting out like that then perhaps something is wrong with them, they may not know exactly what it is but they just feel something is wrong. 

I am bipolar, depression with severe anxiety and agoraphobia. I hid it well from alot of people. People would just think I was shy or a "witch" when I was at my very worst alot of people didn't even notice and would never have guessed. I also had people who would tell me it was all in my head and I just needed to cheer up or get over it. As if it was that simple lol.Mental illness is not really understood by alot of people.

idk as someone who has been judged I think its best not to judge others. they may not have what they say they have but that doesn't mean they are not suffering or going through something dark and needs help just the same.


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## Hagguu

Considering that the person I am speaking of rakes in twice as much as a person on minimum wage, because he has stated he cannot leave the house but can, cannot cook his own meals, yet can, and brags about how he is cheating the system....I think I have every right to judge. But I agree with what you're saying, many people have contradicting symptoms but I don't think I made my point in the right way. These days, for some reason, it is cool to have a mental health illness. People state they have something without a diagnosis and I have witnessed this a lot. Another person I knew stated they were bipolar and on mood stabilizers and antipsychotics...we later discovered (her partner who she lived with confirmed this as he has a sibling with bipolar and became sick of her lying) that she was not, she had never even been to a therapy session or had any help in regards to any of it. Apparently she just wanted people to like her. I cannot judge someone I don't know, but when it is clear that it is all a show, then I make judgement. This is not something you ask for or want to have, it just happens. And I do take offence to people doing it for social gratification and I also find it rather sad that these people think so lowly of themselves that they think feining this will have people take pity on them.


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## ksaxton

dokkajane said:


> Considering that the person I am speaking of rakes in twice as much as a person on minimum wage, because he has stated he cannot leave the house but can, cannot cook his own meals, yet can, and brags about how he is cheating the system....I think I have every right to judge. But I agree with what you're saying, many people have contradicting symptoms but I don't think I made my point in the right way. These days, for some reason, it is cool to have a mental health illness. People state they have something without a diagnosis and I have witnessed this a lot. Another person I knew stated they were bipolar and on mood stabilizers and antipsychotics...we later discovered (her partner who she lived with confirmed this as he has a sibling with bipolar and became sick of her lying) that she was not, she had never even been to a therapy session or had any help in regards to any of it. Apparently she just wanted people to like her. I cannot judge someone I don't know, but when it is clear that it is all a show, then I make judgement. This is not something you ask for or want to have, it just happens. And I do take offence to people doing it for social gratification and I also find it rather sad that these people think so lowly of themselves that they think feining this will have people take pity on them.


That's exactly what happened to me with my friend with "schizophrenia". She told me she thought it would make her look cool and interesting so People would like her. I guess she thought it would make her look "edgy" and "unique" or something.


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## ksaxton

Or like those stories you hear about people who faked having cancer for money and sympathy. If you've ever experienced cancer first hand, or even been close to someone who has, you know it's not a joke and it isn't fun or a way to get sympathy.


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## kksrats

Vegn said:


> And hearing "Nothing will hurt you, you're okay" when you are in the middle of a panic attack and the trigger is still there, does absolutely NOTHING. It's like having a bomb strapped to you and being told that you won't actually die but everyone clears out and the timer is ticking down. But worse because part of you knows that you are fine but you can't hear it because a voice inside your head is screaming the exact opposite.


You just described a panic attack perfectly (at least how I experience them). I've actually started keeping them to myself because people usually make them worse. Luckily I've had very few over the last few years and can probably attribute that to my husband. Honestly, he's not very sympathetic towards my anxiety and basically tells me that I'm working myself up for nothing; he asks what the trigger is, reminds me that I've survived similar situations multiple times and surprisingly it helps. 9 times out of 10 that's what I need to hear, there are the occasional ones that just won't listen to reason though. I'm a pretty logical person, so it really annoys me when I know that there's no reason for me to be anxious but it happens anyway. I have a habit of taking something that just feels a little bit off (like a headache, sore throat, etc.) and turning it into this game of what ifs in my head until I'm convinced that I'm going to die. The whole time I'm doing this I know it's stupid, but I can't help it and it just makes me feel worse until I'm laying in bed trembling. But...as I said, it happens less and less these days which I'm very thankful for


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## Hagguu

ksaxton said:


> Or like those stories you hear about people who faked having cancer for money and sympathy. If you've ever experienced cancer first hand, or even been close to someone who has, you know it's not a joke and it isn't fun or a way to get sympathy.


 Yes! It's the same concept. But everyone would shun someone pretending to have cancer so why is it different with mental health?


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## Vegn

OMG the bipolar thing! Totally forgot about that. My friend (if she hasn't lived 4 houses down from me for the past 4 years we would NOT be friends) says she's bipolar. You are a teenage girl. You have mood swings. It doesn't mean you are bipolar. It means you have raging hormones.

I don't get why having anxiety or depression is cute right now. Many/most people with anxiety don't go flaunting it out, and quite a few actually keep it on the down low whenever possible. When you tell everyone you have anxiety away from the anonymity of a keyboard, you should begin to lose a lot of credibility and not gain popularity. And especially not sympathy when you aren't giving it people who suffer from something by making light of it.


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## PawsandClaws

I have yet to personally meet someone who thinks a mental illness is cute. I think its a new attitude.


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## Hagguu

PawsandClaws said:


> I have yet to personally meet someone who thinks a mental illness is cute. I think its a new attitude.


 It's definitely a new thing. I lost so many friends a few years ago because they thought I was a nut job. Now a lot of people think it's cool and unique. I don't know if it's being glorified in the media (I shut myself off from what is happening in the world really) or it's just another fad, like wearing something cool, if you get what I mean.


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## Hagguu

My little sister (13) has a lot of people she knows claiming they have bipolar, depression etc, and they are 13 years old forr gods sake.


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## Voltage

I've seen/met quite a lot of people who wear mental illness like a fashion accessory. People who are proud of it and let everyone know they have it. Usually these people don't actually have it.

On a side note when I lived in Michigan my boyfriend's little brother had a friend over. I think he was like 12. He came up to me introduced himself and immediately followed it up with, my father molested me. And he would bring it up very frequently and he was so peppy about it I did not know what to think or how to react.

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## BlackAce

My two cents: I'm a psych major with an emphasis in clinical, as well as have struggled with my own issues, so this topic interests me very much. I think in a very few cases some of these pretenders might actually have antisocial personality disorder, which is a problem all its own. Sometimes symptoms can cross disorders, sometimes there are multiple issues, things can occur on a spectrum etc. However, this is not always or even often the case. It's hard to know though, so I personally avoid passing judgment.

As others have mentioned though and from personal experience, I try my very hardest to NOT let my mental disorders define me.....instead of have them be the defining factor about myself. This I think, is maybe the problem people who have had personal struggles find so offensive about those who seem to make it the central part of themselves?


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## gotchea

Voltage said:


> I've seen/met quite a lot of people who wear mental illness like a fashion accessory. People who are proud of it and let everyone know they have it. Usually these people don't actually have it.On a side note when I lived in Michigan my boyfriend's little brother had a friend over. I think he was like 12. He came up to me introduced himself and immediately followed it up with, my father molested me. And he would bring it up very frequently and he was so peppy about it I did not know what to think or how to react.Sent from Petguide.com Free App


 I think that's a control issue. At least it was for me. I'd rather me be the one telling everyone something I don't want people to know, so I have control of information like that coming out. I know gossip spreads, so if I tell one person, I expect that person to tell someone and so on. So instead of it being spread behind my back I'd just tell people upfront and pretend like it doesn't bother me. That way no one can use it against me. There is nothing anyone can say or joke about that topic that I haven't done myself. It's like going overboard on the laughing at yourself type thing. And making yourself really almost numb to the topic, so thy way it doesn't bother you anymore. *my father didn't molest me, but I had a similar experience when I was younger and that's how I handled it.


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## Vegn

It's a fad right now. Like those big floppy sneakers were a few years ago and then it was slip on Adidas. It's a stupid fad because mental health issues don't come and go like that but it is one. I feel like some pretenders have some mental health issues, but majority have family problems and get attention however they can or just don't understand it and are hopping on a band wagon.


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## Hagguu

BlackAce said:


> My two cents: I'm a psych major with an emphasis in clinical, as well as have struggled with my own issues, so this topic interests me very much. I think in a very few cases some of these pretenders might actually have antisocial personality disorder, which is a problem all its own. Sometimes symptoms can cross disorders, sometimes there are multiple issues, things can occur on a spectrum etc. However, this is not always or even often the case. It's hard to know though, so I personally avoid passing judgment. As others have mentioned though and from personal experience, I try my very hardest to NOT let my mental disorders define me.....instead of have them be the defining factor about myself. This I think, is maybe the problem people who have had personal struggles find so offensive about those who seem to make it the central part of themselves?


 I think antisocial personality is not the disorder I would say describes some cases. I would personally say Munchausen syndrome or histrionic personality disorder. Antisocial tend to be highly apathetic (no regards for people or their feelings, so it makes no sense for then to feign illness for attention)


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## Hagguu

And no, I just find it offensive that people take it lightly and as a joke. My point initially is that people find it easy to fake this kind of thing and make it a point for said illness to define themselves, for some reason I don't understand. If you are that unwell, get help. No one wants to be this way, no one asks for it. We take each day as it comes in hope that it gets easier. How can someone not take offence to someone making this up? I feel like a second class citizen, I allowed this to ruin my life a million times over and I'm finally getting myself on track. There's a saying 'if you have not experienced it, you will not understand'. I try my best to not make judgement but people make it so hard. I am doing a masters in psychology because i want to help people like myself and do not wish to numb with medication because that's the only option. I take offence because I know people who have had everything taken from them and are trying so hard to get everything back, and some people crave the attention of their peers so badly that they think that faking something you cant physically see. But everyone with what they claim has had something taken from them, it comes with a price. And its sad, I broke my heart at a friend with bpd who's abusive husband won custody of her 3children because he claimed she was highly unstable. Her kids were the reason she got up in the morning and she had lost them, all because when you have that label, society views you differently. It's sickening that people think this is a fad and a joke. I do not take offence for myself, but everyone who struggles.


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## Pandorascaisse

I take issue with so many people jumping on people they know about "having a condition" that they "don't have". How do you even know? They are called hidden diseases for a reason. It's honestly not that hard to have some of the less intrusive disorders (mild anxiety, depression, etc) and never show any symptoms outwards even to people close to you. It's the people who take these and run with the "oh, all teenagers are turning it into a fad/a joke" that are really hurting the community. Teenagers are very capable of depression, anxiety, even bipolar disorder. Some disorders just can't be _diagnosed _until adulthood, it doesn't mean they can't happen in younger people.

And the "laziness will be in the DSM"? Absolutely ridiculous. Although, wouldn't you love it if it was, because then we would have a cure/treatment for it. 

I'm not talking about people who do show it off or flaunt it - but just because _you_ can't tell they have a disorder doesn't mean they _don't_. I wasn't even going to comment here but most people will experience some sort of depression at some point throughout their lives - it's just whether or not it goes away that is the problem.


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## inod3

We have kind of created a system where normal mental issues have become classified as a disorder. Get anxious about talking in front of large groups and some would say you have an anxiety disorder of some sort, rather than just having relatively normal anxiety. 

I think there's a range of normal and we've narrowed the definition to be too small. It would be like saying there is one correct weight for people 5'7" tall and if you're under that weight by 2 pounds you're too thin and if you're over that weight by 2 pounds you're obese. That obviously would be silly, and yet, some do just that when it comes to mental issues. Anxiety, depression, mood changes, etc... these can all be normal and don't need to be classified as disorders. You could have a class where the teacher was boring and the entire classes attention drifts away, but that doesn't mean the class has attention deficit disorder. We can create this idea of what a healthy mental person is like and if we personally don't meet that ourselves we assign it to a mental condition of some kind. I would say that anxiety itself is normal and healthy. Further, that there is a range of acceptable anxiety that varies from person to person. If person B has more anxiety than person A that doesn't mean that person B has a disorder anymore than person B weighing 5 pounds more than person A means person B is obese. 

And yet, that's pretty much what every drug commercial ever tries to convince people. Have these symptoms, you may suffer from XYZ and should talk to your doctor about SuperWonderDrug! I think the greater issue with the self-diagnosed mental illnesses is that the environment that makes people feel they have to either be some idea's of perfection or else they have a disorder. It's easy to compare ourselves to someone who we see as perfect and because we're not as perfect we must be flawed. Yes, some of us do have issues that go beyond normal. I just think it's important to realize normal is a range rather than a single state of being. There's probably very few people who meet our idea of the perfect mind, and that is fine.


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## Hagguu

I think we can all agree to disagree. We all have viewpoints on this, I shouldn't have brought this up in the first place. But just keep in mind, if people can fake other illnesses for attention, like actual physical illnesses, why is there reason not to believe others do the same with mental health. And inod, I completely agree.


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## kksrats

Pandorascaisse said:


> And the "laziness will be in the DSM"? Absolutely ridiculous. Although, wouldn't you love it if it was, because then we would have a cure/treatment for it.


It was meant to be ridiculous lol I agree with both points of view that people have been expressing. If someone tells me "Oh I've been so depressed lately" I'm not going to call them out even if I do think it's a fabrication to get sympathy. The fact is, people faking illnesses and disorders do harm to the community, as do the skeptics of all the people who are open about a possible disorder. It's a double edged sword and I think that inod3 did a very good job of describing the current state of our society.


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## Hagguu

kksrats said:


> It was meant to be ridiculous lol I agree with both points of view that people have been expressing. If someone tells me "Oh I've been so depressed lately" I'm not going to call them out even if I do think it's a fabrication to get sympathy. The fact is, people faking illnesses and disorders do harm to the community, as do the skeptics of all the people who are open about a possible disorder. It's a double edged sword and I think that inod3 did a very good job of describing the current state of our society.


Exactly, the inital point was not 'OH everyone who claims to have a disorder, does not and their faking' it's the ones who have literally been caught out for me personally, then admit fault, which leads you to believe that there will be more doing so. Like I stated, my friend is very open about how he lies and 'cheats the system' out of money he very clearly does not need. And indeed, inod made a valid point. Maybe it is society making out that unless your mind fits into the ideal of a 'stable mind', then you are mentally ill. But in all honesty, I think this has caused more grief than it is worth....


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## BlackAce

That's entirely the reason an antisocial pd individual would fake a disorder. Utter disregard for anyone else's feelings. It's rare, but possible. And since there's no way to really know with a certainty who is who, I don't believe anyone is in a position to judge.


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## BlackAce

Also just wanted to add that I'm not advising to diagnose (so to speak) anyone over the internet, obviously. Maybe my point wasn't clear, but I think it's important to consider the shades of gray that often predominate mental illness. Basically people who pretend or fake illness could have issues of their own, whether it be antisocial, narcissism pd, munchausen ect. Because each symptom can potentially be expressed to a higher/lesser degree than another which makes it tricky.


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## Hagguu

Like I said, agree to disagree.


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## Hagguu

But I do agree with you on underlying issues. But it isn't always the case.


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## BlackAce

Yeah I've tried to make it a point that I know this isn't true all of the time, I was just trying to make a case for the possibility.


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## BlackAce

And sorry if it didn't relate to your original post, these long threads seem to get me confused as to the main point. I was more adding in my thoughts to the general direction of all the posts lol


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## Hagguu

It's fine xD but I understand what you're saying. And you're right, there are cases where there are exceptions, a lot of them actually. Its just frustrating, in the case of my friend, where he is happy to sit there doing nothing and using mental health as an excuse to not do anything and lie through his teeth to get money he doesn't need. And some people do this for said reason, as a social statement, or actually due to other underlying problems. I didn't mean to be harsh about the whole thing, it just gets me frustrated that this abuse of mental health does happen, in one way or another.


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## Hagguu

But yeah, I agree with both sides. And I completely agree with what you are saying and what everyone is saying really. Like krats said, it's a double ended sword...and apparently a sharp one at that haha xD


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## Hagguu

Edged!!! This phone oh my GOD.


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## ilovescience

Whoa - Just fyi, that post seems really judgmental. I mean, if anything, the rant section is a good place for that, but still. On one hand, I do understand your frustrations.. I hate it when people flippantly say "Oh my god! I have ADD, too!" and I'll wholeheartedly admit, I'll look at them with the most unamused, judgey-judge face ever. But on the other hand, my family doesn't believe in mental illnesses ("it's all in your head; you're just lazy; you just need God; you aren't disciplined enough; someone needs to light a fire under your ass, etc etc ETC") and tbh.. I was actually accused of this *very* recently, which is why it might be a touchy subject. It's hard enough to be dealing with a mental illness - and it certainly doesn't help when someone (especially people close to you) flat out denies this reality because they don't believe in mental illnesses in general or certain mental illnesses (how convenient for my uncle to believe in autism, but not in depression and ADD - oh, did I mention my cousin is autistic?). I mean, unless you're a trained professional authorized to diagnose these things, I'm not sure you have the right to judge whether or not someone has a mental illness. Not everyone's illnesses are alike.. I experience and struggle with depression differently than my sister, and my sister's bipolar disorder is vastly different than my friend's (they also have a different *type* of BPD).. People also have different ways of coping or expressing/hiding pain and whatnot.. I just recently found out my (other) cousin deals with dark thoughts... This came as a complete surprise, considering she's one of the most accomplished and happy-go-lucky person in our family. And you would think, having had suicidal thoughts in the past, and continually struggling with the abyss that is depression, I might've been able to tell even just a little bit - but nope. I sort of gaped at her in complete shock.


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## nanashi7

I do understand that people can and do hide illnesses well. I suffer from depersonalization which means I get scared and shut myself away. That me doesn't have anxiety and is very well adjusted. Most people don't realize I suffer from panic attacks and if they do don't grasp the severity. 

But this isn't about people who say they have disorders and don't appear to. It's about people who honestly don't but fake that they do. If you know someone like this, you know how much it hurts. I feel like a monster my family doesn't see me as functional enough to be trusted and I'm constantly in this special pity category where everyone empathizes. Somebody WISHES they were like this? They think that there are BENEFITS to it?


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## Hagguu

Thank you namashi. If people actually read my prior posts (fyi - this person actually brags about cheating the system with his 'mental health and claiming money for things he does nit actually suffer from) I have said I do not judge people who claim to have disorders, but have been in several situations where people claim they do and are completely caught out Nd then admit fault. If people could learn to read this would be a lot easier... ..ugh. But thanks again sweet. Just feel like everyone is missing the point.


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## Juliah456

The worst part is that because of all the glorification, people with real mental disorders etc are ignored or told they just do it for attention. If I mention my anxiety disorder, I get 10 other people saying 'omg! Me toooo I get so scared for tests' etc etc. it makes people with real problems look like fools. What I don't understand is why people think having a mental disorder would make people, idk, love them more or feel pity for them. A lot of people know first hand that that is rarely the case.


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## Hagguu

Yes, it's like what inod said earlier, normal human emotion is now classed as a disorder so everyone seems to jump on the 'mental health' bandwagon. I mean, in some cases, there will be situations where there are actual underlying issues, but a lot of people assume that it is in fact a way to create sympathy from themselves. Yet, in all seriousness, it can be quite damaging on the whole mental health community. These people do so via self diagnosis (seriously, I could curse web MD and wiki) but they cannot be given a diagnosis without actual consultation. Myself and presumably a lot of people here, have probably gone through years of therapy, consultations and medication, so I don't see how anyone with a disorder could agree with someone doing such a thing, as we are all aware of how it affects our lives and how it continues to do so. What completely baffles me about this whole situation is how people get on this moral high ground. It's so ignorant to believe this kind of malpractice does not go on. But then again, if you have never been in this situation and found someone to be lying through their teeth all in an attempt to blame their horrid personality on a mental disorder so they won't lose what little friends they have due to said horrible compulsive lies combined with personality, then by all means, continue to be ignorant.


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## Jessiferatu

I'm not sure how I feel about people "faking" disorders. Seems pretty low, but it also makes me wonder what exactly is going on inside them that they feel it's acceptable to do that. 

It took me a long time to seek help. My issues were (and sometimes still are) debilitating. I talk about my problems. Not to glorify mental illness or garner sympathy, but because being open about it actually helps me cope. I also like to open a dialogue about it, since there's still so much stigma.


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## Hagguu

Yeah, there are underlying issues, and it might be something as simple as low self esteem, which is sad really, but some people just do it for personal gain, which is just bizarre.
And being open with people can and can't help, it feels good to talk about it with someone and explain to people why you sometimes act the way you do and help them understand more, but some people just see it as a way to get attention, even if you don't talk about it all the time and only when you need to. But even then, some people do need to talk a lot because they have a lot going on all of the time, even with the most 'simple' of problems. But I'm glad your finally getting help, I think it's definitely the hardest step to make, for anyone.


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## nanashi7

I'm not so sure I'm ready to say "well there must be something wrong with the fakers". Mental health doesn't have the status of cancer, faking it isn't akin to faking cancer. Mental health is almost half a joke still, and I know for a fact I've met kids who were disappointed that they passed all the tests and exams that preclude a diagnosis. Why? Because being "crazy" like a fashion statement is cool, actual insanity isn't. Think about the books and songs glorifying mental illnesses or asylums. 

There is nothing wrong with the fakers that isn't wrong with our entire society.


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## Hagguu

I meant in some cases, of course there can be issues, but for some reason (I am completely out of the loop with modern society but a few people have also said that it's like a fashion accessory nowadays) but there must be something triggering it, like a sudden craze of footwear or new brand kind of thing. But things like fashion etc are pushed on people using the good old 'if you don't have this/don't like this then there's something wrong with you', but in all honesty, I cannot/will never understand fashion nowadays, so I don't really understand this. And oh my gosh, people are disappointed about not having a mental illness?! Now I've heard everything. You think that would be good news! But I guess it's like a way of standing out, yet being the same as everyone else. So essentially being part of the crowd, while being different.
But what you said about mental health to cancer is quite true. Mental health has only recently become accepted in society but no one is really educated on it apart from the people who work in the field, suffer from it or study it, so they don't understand it. It's like schizophrenia for example, I've seen a few TV shows who glorify this illness, and also people claiming to have the paranoid sub-type and being proud of it, yet having no idea to what psychosis actually was, or never heard of it, which raises an eyebrow (as psychosis is the base for the actual diagnosis of any sub-type of schizophrenia). A friend of mine developed paranoid and a lot of the time she was completely lost in her own fantasies and fixations, was quite sad and stressful really, but I don't understand why people think or want to be labelled as that because it's 'cool'? Or is it that the population are literally so clueless about mental illness and all it entails that it in itself just becomes one huge joke?

Can we move to the moon and give this whole civilised society thing another go?? xD


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## MissSix

Having dealt with my own psychological issues, and the severe issues of friends, I loathe people that act like mental disorders are trendy. I've dealt with that in volunteering at high schools, and I have gone off on a few people who called themselves (or someone else) bipolar when they were just mercurial. One of my friends is bipolar, he has frequent auditory hallucinations, delusions that angels are judging our every move and that he can see who is going to ****. He's attempted suicide several times because of this. It really grinds my gears that people don't understand just how difficult it is to deal with mental illness and the kind of heartache it causes. I always tell these people that they should be glad they are normal! They don't have to dodge shadows, or wake up with strange injuries, they won't end up in the hospital for eating something toxic because something in their head compelled them to. 

I also grit my teeth at how people assume that all crazy people are dangerous. Very few people out there would ever do something violent, being mentally ill doesn't make one more prone to violence. However, because of this ignorance, the mentally ill are far more likely to become the victims of violence. Go figure, perfectly sane, ignorant people, are more violent that the "dangerous" person suffering from schizophrenia.


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## Xerneas

As someone with a fair share of issues, this problem is one of the most irritating and offensive fads that there is -- it makes me often feel like the problems I have suffered all my life are nothing but minuscule jokes because someone thinks they have ADD/ADHD because they get distracted sometimes, or they have anxiety because they're worried over a school test. It is really something awful.

Just as worse is when you will tell them some of your symptoms and they say something like "Oh, I have that too. I must be autistic. I must have depression." No. Everyone has blood sugar spikes, but that does not mean we are all diabetic, now does it?

I am not, however, completely against self diagnosis. I understand that not everyone can afford it, find someone to diagnose them, or if they are not independent yet has parents who will accept them or actually listen to their concerns. I also understand that sometimes, yes, even professionals are wrong, especially with disorders that have many overlapping symptoms with others or present differently in different sexes -- I have known many who were misdiagnosed and they knew all along. Not everyone who self diagnoses looks at a generic list of symptoms, relates to a few and then claims to have it -- the people who do shed an absolutely terrible light on the other people who are FAR smarter than that. I don't encourage it but I understand that not everyone is so fortunate enough to be able to reach a professional. Just saying. I prefer not to really debate on it but I wanted to remind that not every self-diagnosed person is trying to be cool, everyone has a different situation.

What I am against is saying you have OCD because you like to wash your hands, have bipolar because you have moodswings sometimes, autism because you're awkward, ADHD because you don't want to do your homework, depression because you felt a little sad, etc., just so you can be 'cool' too. These people are the ones who make it so those that are truly impaired are branded lazy, fake, etc.


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