# Loss Is The Worst



## Toxyk-Melodi (Dec 21, 2013)

_I will never forget the day I brought you home._
_My mom was so mad, she hated the idea of having you around._
_Little by little though, you grew on her._
_And she loved you just as much as I._
_I always thought it was funny how one of your ears was smaller than the other._
_You were always trying to escape from that silly tank we had you in first._
_I had to put heavy books on it to make sure you didn't get loose._
_And when I tried to get you into that exercise ball, I thought you were gonna bite me you were so mad!_
_But you never did._
_You gave the sweetest kisses, quick licks upon my fingers to show me all was fine._
_Cuddling up to my neck, and when you tried to put your face in my ear xD_
_You did the same thing to my nose once too._
_Getting tangled in my moms hair, and mine (when it was long enough)_
_I swear when I cut off my hair, you felt around my neck wondering what the **** happened to it._
_The first time you got sick, I was so frightened I almost puked. The second time was even worse. _
_But you made it through, just as I always knew you would._
_And the second cage you had. _
_You hardly ever ran in the wheel, you preferred to use it for sleep. _
_That reminds me of the hammock I got you once, till you chewed it to pieces._
_I still have the wheel though. And I'll probably always keep it._
_I would take you into the bathroom sometimes, and let you play around on the sink._
_I loved how you picked up my mothers glasses, like they were your own toy no less._
_It was adorable. _
_Eventually you were brave enough to drink out of the sink, when I let it dribble water._
_Or when you would get a treat and scamper onto my shoulder, nibbling away happily._
_My friends loved you, and I know for certain Andrew wanted to take you home more than once._
_You loved to walk all over us, literally._
_And curl up beneath the folds of mothers blankets, enjoying the nice dark places._
_When I let you out, running all over my and the chair, messing with my laptop keys._
_You even ate one of the buttons on our remotes, you rascal. _
_I love you regardless, and always._
_God, I'm going to miss you. _
_This pain isn't going to leave for some time, I know._
_At least you're no longer in pain._
_In that room today, I knew what was going to happen._
_I just didn't want to believe it._
_You laid there in your cage, your breathing shallow. _
_You knew too, didn't you?_
_When they left to let me have some time, you forced what energy you had left._
_To come to me, crawling up my arm and even to Nanny's._
_Then you let me cradle you against my chest._
_WE stood there like that for so long, but not long enough._
_You blinked your black eyes at me, your breathing difficult._
_I know it was the right thing to do, but losing you._
_God, why is it so difficult?_
_I wish I could bring back the good times, but memories will have to do._
_Good bye my little angel._
_May your wings be as big as your heart<3_
~~~
Today I had to put down my rat Sorcha.
I'm going to miss her more than words can express.
How do you get over this pain?
I just....
I'm so lost right now.​


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## DustyRat (Jul 9, 2012)

Sad news to hear. You made a fitting eulogy. Best way to get over the loss is to get another fur baby. Worked for me


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## never-sleep (Mar 3, 2012)

That was beautiful. 

There's nothing that can make you get over this. You don't get over the death of a loved one. You never do. That pain is always there. It won't be so raw forever. Soon its just discomfort that comes when you think about it. One day, you'll be able to think about her without tearing up, maybe even look back at your memories with fondness and happiness. It will get easier for you, but you never get over it. You just learn to live without them. You realize that they were so perfect they only needed a short amount of time to love so much. Humans need more time to do that, rats don't. They live fast, they love fast, my god even their hearts beat fast. They don't need as much time as people to live to the fullest.

The hurt doesn't go away, but it does get easier.


I'm so sorry for your loss. 


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## Toxyk-Melodi (Dec 21, 2013)

@DustyRat || It helped some, but not enough sadly.

@never-sleep || Thank you, I needed to read that. They really do go so fast. I'd never thought about it before. It just hurts a lot. And you're right, it won't always last. But the raw pain does get to you. 

Thank you both. I'm better. Not 100% but I do have people coming over for moral support soon.


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## aimleigh (Feb 7, 2014)

that is the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. I'm on the bus literally in tears :-(. RIP little one.Hope you're okay


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## pip367622 (Feb 24, 2014)

THAT was a beautiful from the heart to page feeling. I felt your loss so strongly reading that, just replied to another member about their losses too, saying having had our ratties 7 weeks, I cannot imagine a day without them, by day 1 they had us......xxxxx thinking of you, keep strong Pip xx


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## Toxyk-Melodi (Dec 21, 2013)

@aimleigh || Thank you. I'm sorry to have put you in tears! I'm doing better though.

@pip || Awww. D: Thats so sad. But I thank you<3

ALSO.
I decided to commission an artist to draw her for me...so I'll be sharing that with everyone when it's done. I figured it was a good way to remember her. I'm making a little memorial table sorta thing with the artwork, her photo and urn.


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## Hey-Fay (Jul 8, 2013)

Toxyk-Melodi said:


> @aimleigh || I'm making a little memorial table sorta thing with the artwork, her photo and urn.


That sounds like a wonderful way to keep her memory. I am sorry for your loss, but it does get a bit better over time. 
In the words of Rat Daddy, " when one passes it opens a spot for another to live". 

When my Jasper passed I was shattered, but I also felt the need to take in another so she could live and flourish and be loved. I'm not saying to replace your Sorcha, no rat can replace what you've lost, but you may feel better if you give another a shot at life.


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## Toxyk-Melodi (Dec 21, 2013)

I've been thinking about it. Getting another rat I mean. Just...not yet.


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## Hey-Fay (Jul 8, 2013)

And that's ok. You take all the time you need.


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## JasmineTara95 (May 25, 2011)

That was so nice to read, so many little things there remind me of my babies that I've lost, had me tearing up because I lost my most recent on the 20th of this month but it made me smile! I'm so sorry for your loss you never forget but it gets easier as you start to think about the happy times and that's all you will remember after a while!


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## Sassmasteroli (Apr 24, 2014)

that was so beautiful, i'm in tears too, and i don't usually cry at much!
I'm sorry for your loss. I feel your pain, i really do.
I'm sure it'll get loads better. :c


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