# This is a nightmare



## Hal900x (Sep 16, 2015)

Our dog died. We are a bunch of antisocial animal lovers. We connect to animals in a way that is ridiculously loving. The whole household, myself my girlfriend and her mom. And with that image in mind, this was the greatest animal we've ever had. He was perfect in every way. We had him only two short years and one night he was gone. That was a couple days ago, and the whole house is rocked with grief on a level I have never seen or experienced in my 5 decades of having lost dozens of loved ones, both human and animal. 

Meanwhile, here I am with my very first rats. They weren't much socialized when I got them, lab rescues. I spent months trust training them from being almost wild to climbing on the cage when I walk by. One turned out to be an a-hole, though I love him still: sleeps most of the day, reclusive, not overly friendly but docile enough after the training. The other is the Costello to his Abbot. Chubby, goofy, always begging for treats, general disregard for his own safety in hilarious ways (not too agile, this one), and very friendly. Jumps right up on my shoulder as of two weeks ago. 

Guess which one is dying? Yeah, at the exact same time as we are staggering from this loss, my first rat, the one I fell in love with, is shriveling up literally before my eyes. The cage is in my room, and as I listen to the agonized sobs of my girlfriend, I watch my little boy desperately try to slake his now-constant thirst from whatever wasting disease is killing him. His backbone is now visible and has gone from an obese 725 grams to under 400, in spite of increased treats and the best food money can buy. 

The first death was sudden. Now this one is unfolding in front of my eyes. It is unspeakably awful. 

Now, I have gathered from my time lurking forums, speaking with vets and other pet owners as we go through this etc., that rat owners seem to develop a unique type of attachment coupled with detachment. They seem to accept rat deaths as a matter of course, the majority at least. I also gather that this is a result of the heretofore unbeknownst to me short lifespan and high mortality of rats, as well as the fact that they are after all rodents, and they don't return affection in any kind of higher mammalian way. They mimic it through socialization, trust training, etc. Sure, I know all that but this is my first rat ever, and I am a hopeless animal lover. I was totally unprepared for this. I had no idea of all these things prior to adopting these guys. Add to that deep financial insecurity in the whole family right now (we are seriously broke across the board, when it rains it pours) and the crazy high prices of getting a specialty animal cared for professionally...but that is really the least of all this. It's just money. 

For now, he still seems fairly happy and normal acting, other than the constant hunger and thirst. He's getting veterinary care, and he'll be getting more specific and more expensive care soon. But even at this stage it's pretty clear he's in bad shape. It's probably either diabetes or a renal condition, plus secondary infection that isn't responding to antibiotics. It's sh*t, is what it is. Pure f*cking sh*t. It is not fair. It is cruel and unfair to be experiencing this with my first rats, at the exact same time as we are reeling from crippling grief. I wish I had some of the matter-of-fact acceptance of reality that experienced rat owners have, but I don't. Sh*t.


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## Gribouilli (Dec 25, 2015)

He needs to see a vet asap. What antibiotics is your rat on? What are the antibiotics he isn't responding to?I'm sorry for the loss of your dog.


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## StormAndWinter (Mar 5, 2014)

We just know that they have short lifespans, and they will all go someday. It doesn't hurt us any less, I sobbed my eyes out all day yesterday and the night before because my Winter died of old age, even though I knew for weeks she was slowing down and would go soon. Kudos for taking him to the vet, rats are hardy little guys, as long as you're there for him he could very well make it through whatever this is and be happy and healthy for a couple more years. 

I'm sorry for your loss though, grief is one of the worst feelings, and to pair that with dread and worry for your rat must be really hard. Just spend time with him, cuddle him, and hope for the best.


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## Hal900x (Sep 16, 2015)

Gribouilli said:


> He needs to see a vet asap. What antibiotics is your rat on? What are the antibiotics he isn't responding to?I'm sorry for the loss of your dog.


Antibiotics are unknown, will be asking the vet today. I posted a full health history, progress and lab report in the health section.


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## Hal900x (Sep 16, 2015)

StormAndWinter said:


> We just know that they have short lifespans, and they will all go someday. It doesn't hurt us any less, I sobbed my eyes out all day yesterday and the night before because my Winter died of old age, even though I knew for weeks she was slowing down and would go soon. Kudos for taking him to the vet, rats are hardy little guys, as long as you're there for him he could very well make it through whatever this is and be happy and healthy for a couple more years.
> 
> I'm sorry for your loss though, grief is one of the worst feelings, and to pair that with dread and worry for your rat must be really hard. Just spend time with him, cuddle him, and hope for the best.


Thank you. Sorry to hear you lost one. I am doing the best I can and have posted a request for an alternative vet and a separate post with health history, labs etc. If it's treatable I will do anything I can, unless it's something that is going to be long and painful, in which case I'll just keep doing what I'm doing now: taking him out every day, loving him as best I can and giving him all the care that I can. I'm so deep in credit card debt another thousand won't be all that different, at least I have credit. After the self-recrimination and hindsight regrets that came with losing the dog, I've decided that money is not an issue and I'm going to do whatever it takes if it's treatable, short of something like insulin injections if it turns out to be diabetes or something like that. That just sounds like prolonging suffering to me. For now, he's still fairly "happy" as a rat can be perceived to be, but it's hard to really know how a creature down low on the mammalian scale really "feels". I just pray he isn't suffering too much.


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## Gribouilli (Dec 25, 2015)

Do you have CareCredit?


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## Spectre (Jan 9, 2014)

It's horrible, it really is. I watched my boy get sicker and sicker while taking him to endless vets trying to help, but the fact is, they just don't live very long. But as I see it, they're such lovely creatures, even if they only live a short time, I will never regret any time spent with them. The pain of losing one isn't going to make my give up the years of love and friendship. 
I'm so sorry to hear of your boy, I wish I could give him a boop on the snoot and a yoghurt drop. Stay strong.


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